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مقاله "دکتر نانسی باک" بر طبیعت ذهنی ادراک تأکید دارد و نشان می دهد که چگونه تجربیات فردی ما، درک ما از واقعیت را شکل می دهند. او داستان شخصی خود را از خرید خانه با خواهرش را بازگو می کند و نشان می دهد که چگونه آنها یک خانه را به طور متفاوتی به دلیل دیدگاه های منحصر به فرد خود درک کردند. در حالی که "دکتر باک" یک خانه کامل با منظرهای زیبا دید، خواهرش بر شیب تند راه خانه تمرکز کرد، که نشان می دهد چگونه نیازها و تجربیات شخصی بر ادراک ما تأثیر می گذارند.
این مقاله همچنین بررسی می کند که چگونه حواس، دانش و ارزش های ما ادراکات ما را شکل می دهند. "دکتر باک" توضیح می دهد که آنچه ما حس می کنیم، می دانیم و ارزش می گذاریم، "تصاویر دنیای کیفی" ما را ایجاد می کند که برای هر فرد منحصر به فرد است.
او استدلال می کند که درک و شناخت این تفاوت ها برای سلامت روان ما و تقویت ارتباط های ما ضروری است. با کنجکاوی نسبت به دیدگاه های دیگران به جای قضاوت آن ها، می توانیم درک و همکاری بهتری را با آنها داشته باشیم و به سلامت روان خود کمک کنیم.
اصل مقاله
?WHOSE REALITY IS IT ANYWAY
Our perception is dependent upon our individual Quality World pictures
Many years ago, my eldest sister accompanied me house shopping. Both of my children
had plans of their own as they completed college and took their next steps into
adulthood; one aiming for California and the other for Colorado. I was several years
post-divorce and in search of a smaller dwelling for my aging mother and me. I did not
have a clear idea of the house I was seeking, but I had faith I’d know it when I saw it
My helpful and knowledgeable realtor took us to several places that were kay, but not for
me. That is until he showed us the house on the hill. As soon as we got out of the car
and I turned east, I was in love! Upon entering the house my love deepened. Here was a
place with a large central room, including the living and dining rooms, plus a kitchen all
open concept. To the left was a den plus master bedroom and bath. To the right were
three more bedrooms and bath. Once I look out the large picture window facing east and
took in the view of the water, the bay, all the way out to Block Island, I knew I was home
This was the place for my mother and me. She would have her “wing” of the house and I
would have mine. As we got back into the realtor’s car I was filled with excitement and
!joy. What a perfect house! Living on top of this hill would be awesome
Once back in my car, leaving the realtor for this day’s search, my sister said of the house
“Too bad about that driveway. Otherwise, this would be a terrific place.”
?I said, “What driveway”
Perceptions are a funny thing. Each of us has an individual and unique perceptual
system that bridges the gap between what is out there existing in the environment and
our own internal system that takes in and makes sense of this information. Each of us
interprets the world and configures it into our own personal interpretation of reality
Although my sister and I were seeing the same properties, our perception of what we
were seeing was not the same. She saw a potential insurmountable obstacle, a driveway
with a severe incline. I saw a perfect home with space to accommodate essential
individual privacy for my mother and me, and we could have delightful shared space
with a dramatic, ever-changing view of the waterway and harbor
?Who was right
Every person on the planet has his/her own, individualized perceptions. Mine is mine and
yours is yours. Two people who witness the same accident or crime may file two
.conflicting reports of what occurred. Each observation is unique for each person
What we sens
What we know
What we value, believe, and/or want
:What we sense
As humans we are born with five senses: hearing, seeing, tasting, touching and smelling
(Some believe there is a 6th sense which includes the ability to intuit, getting a feeling
about something beyond using only the five basic senses.) Not all people have the same
.sense-ability
:What we know
During our entire lifetime we are constantly learning and growing. Some curious people
may learn more because they seek out new experiences, people and/or things. What a
person knows and understands at age 15-years is greater that what she knew when she
was 5-years old. There are many people, places, things, and experiences in the world that
each of us will never know about. Our not knowing does not cease these things from
existing. There is also a large in-between category of ideas and functions you may not
know or understand, but you may want to learn. This list could include a foreign
language, full understanding of what can be done on your cell phone or computer, how
to run for and win a political office, the eco-systems in Alaska, the culture and customs
practiced in Tasmania, and thousands more. Once you have an interest or need,
however, you can learn and perhaps discover that these things were in your
environment all along. You didn’t see them because you didn’t know what you were
looking at. Have you ever had the experience of purchasing a new car? Suddenly you
begin to see this car everywhere. Until you purchased yours, you never even saw or knew
!about this particular make and model. Everyone seems to have chosen the same color too
According to Miles Kington, knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it
.in a fruit salad
:What we value, believe, and want
When we sense and know about a person or place, we ultimately place a value on it. We
claim the pizza is good, awful, or unremarkable. The same goes for the weather, a new
person that we just met, a song that we heard for the first time, or the wait time needed to pay
and check out of a store. Our opinion, descriptor, and level of value is based on how we compare
our sense and knowledge of this thing with what we want, i.e., our own quality world pictures.
Remember, these are the pictures and internal movies that are associated with strong, positive
feelings for the people, things, systems, and beliefs that are need-satisfying to us. When I meet
.someone who reminds me of my father, I immediately have positive feelings toward him
Every year I attempt to make an apple pie for Thanksgiving dinnerMy pie always falls short of the pie my mother made. These are examples from people of
high value to me, even after their death
The opposite also occurs. Arriving on time for a medical appointment only to be told I
need to wait more than twenty minutes is unacceptable to me. I’m on time. You should
be too. My time is as valuable to me as yours is to you. I have a very clear quality world
idea of punctuality for both parties attendance at this meeting. This is based on my quality world
picture and subsequent internal dialogue. I feel equally strong about people who want to
point out the shortcomings and liabilities of an event while I’m in the midst of sharing
my joyful experience with them. I’m tempted to say to these rude people, “If you don’t have
anything nice to say, keep your mouth shut.” At the same time I have another quality
work picture of me being a kind and compassionate person. I remain silent while seeing
them with love, gratefully giving thanks for my positive experience with them. My perceptions
!are based on my quality world pictures. This is my perception, not theirs
Next, according to Christopher Moore, CHILDREN SEE MAGIC BECAUSE THEY LOOK
.FOR IT
Each of us lives in a world of our own making, even when we seemingly experience the
same reality. Our perceived world is how we take in the information from out there and
sense, know, and make meaning of the world. Each of us uniquely builds our personal
representation of the real world. Even though our perceptions may be similar to
.someone else, it is not the same. Yours is yours and mine is mine
We each delete, distort and generalize based on our perceptual experiences. These are
.also known as our bias, distortions and/or blind spots
It’s cold in here
Autumn is the best season
The people in Colorado are nice and friendlier that the people in New England
The people in the south are not as smart as the people in the north
Florida is the best place to retire
Getting a seasonal flu shot keeps you healthy
Northerners are ivy league, liberal songs
People from New York City don’t know how to drive
All people from blue/red states are . . . fill in the blank
People who wonder whether the glass is half empty or half full miss the point, i.e., the glass
is refillable. Simon Sinek
When we experience and discover that our beliefs about the world are different from one
another, life gets interesting. This can lead to lively discussions between folks
Sometimes these debates can lead to surprising and humorous exchanges. I never
thought of it that way. And sometimes they can result in angry, hate-filled feelings and
name-calling, I never realized what a narrow minded, prejudiced person you are. Sadly
.too much of our present political climate is filled with the latter
GROWING GOOD MENTAL HEALTH means letting go of needing everything to be
your way. Debating over who is right is fruitless. Since we each make up our own
version of reality, there is never going to be an absolute answer. You are right for you, I
am right for me. If we want to get along, get curious instead of righteous. I’ll tell you my
perception if you tell me yours. Then together we can come to some agreement. Perhaps
we can agree to disagree. After hearing about your perception, I may now better
understand and appreciate your point-of-view, even if I don’t agree. Will you do the same
?for me
(If every could learn that what is right for me does not make it right for anyone else the world would be a much happier place (William Glasser
Understanding and appreciating that we each build a personal understanding of reality
is essential in GROWING GOOD MENTAL HEALTH. My perception is mine. Your
.perception is yours. No one is right or wrong. It’s okay to be different from each other
For the preservation of your important relationships that contribute mightily to your
good mental health, we need to get curious about our differences, rather than getting angry
.or indignant about them
.P.S. My mother and I did buy the house on the hill and we did renovate the driveway